The Christmas tree and trimmings have all been taken down and packed away. A new year, a new beginning. Used to be that I'd get myself all worked up that a new year had come and what it might bring in its wake et al. This time I'm completely blasé about it all. The future's not ours to see or worry over. Amen.
What I've been feeling very strongly about over a fairly quiet and uneventful Christmas season though is that I want to live more for the Lord. Over the last few years, my enthusiasm for wholesome Christian living has ebbed disgracefully as my faith has dipped abysmally. I'm tired of that. I want to be reinvented, reinvigorated, reclaim lost ground and live less selfishly. In hindsight, I believe it was my faith that gave me whatever dignity I had. I'm tired of hobnobbing, especially online, with sceptics who disbelieve, and of unwittingly allowing myself to let their dissension and cynicism rub off on me. I'm a believer, been one since Christmas 1989 and I want to go back to remaining one. Lord, I believe, help thou my unbelief.
On a less tired note, yesterday I picked up the entire 5 seasons of Ally McBeal on dvd. I have no idea when I'll ever actually get to watching all of them but I've been dying to get a look in at the Christmas episodes with Robert Downey Jr. Specially the part where he sings Joni Mitchell's River so beautifully.
I also have this thick tome of papers I'm supposed to edit. A friend, or perhaps more accurately, an old acquaintance, asked me to edit some 157 pages of a manuscript for a book on Mizo history. Whole lotta reading to do. I wouldn't do it if it weren't for my interest in Mizo literature. Speaking of which, my Mizo lit blog has been stagnating horribly. I've sort of run out of steam on that. Going around begging people to contribute is just not that high on my list of priorities anymore. Specially when the feedback hasn't been quite what I'd hoped for. Oh well, perhaps this manuscript editing will throw up something new.
Here's to the next 365 days of whatever will be.
From the airport lounge in IGI waiting for our flight back to Tokyo, hope you have a happy, reinvigorated, Christian new year.
ReplyDeleteOh boy, I'm flattered that my blog's been opened at an airport lounge :) Thank you very much indeed, plats, and I do hope you have a safe flight back to Tokyo.
ReplyDeleteally mcbeal! haha, i completely forgot about that show. i'm not very fond of tv shows but i love love pushing daisies. watch it, if you haven't already!
ReplyDeleteps. i haven't listened to joni mitchell in ages. i love that woman.
Kum tharah mi dang tanpuiin hun i hmang tan a, i ti tha hle mai.
ReplyDeleteKum 2009 hian malsawmna rawn thlen che rawh se.
my husband says he doesn't believe in God.. But I have a feeling that even a nonbeliever, if he has a right set of ideals to go by, is as close to Him as one who believes..
ReplyDeleteHere's wishing you a happy new year
anna, I used to watch the first few shows of Ally but it's hard making regular time for TV shows so I bailed out many seasons ago. Love the music on the show, for one thing. And I'll definitely keep an eye out for Pushing Daisies. Glad to hear you love Mitchell. Thought it was all techno muzak for the younger generation though.
ReplyDeletesamuapa, nia hei ka tum chu ania - thawh chak erawh a har fu mai. Nangpoh 2009 hi i tan kum tha a nih ka beisei.
ReplyDeleteGauri, sounds like you've come to terms living with an atheist. Must be difficult at times. Well, good luck and a happy new year to you too.
ReplyDeletetechno music? anything but!
ReplyDeleteHehe then I guess they broke the mould when they made you :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for your Mizo lit blog. My belief in a sustained drive to tell our stories on our own terms seems to flail...Lord, I believe, help thou my unbelief!! I'm not smart enough to be an active conversation partner on that blog but am a keen and regular visitor. If there's any encouragement, hope the blog will pick up more steam this year.
ReplyDeleteThanks Philo, but to be honest, it's people like you who appreciate the blog but don't really give any kind of feedback that rile me. Argh. I want to know who reads what and why and when and where, and the big yawning silence leaves me thinking oh shit, why do I even bother anyway!
ReplyDeleteOn a more personal note, I heard abt your good news and I'd like to say congrats and God bless :)
hey, changed my blog name to joonbird. just letting you know :)
ReplyDeleteAh thanks, joonbird :) Nice name that.
ReplyDelete"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynism by those who have not got it"
ReplyDelete*AHEM*
*****rtoon's getting married (as he tells me, he's a 'bit' FAT, it seems) , so will be flying to **gpur leaving My Woman behind for a day. Just thought I should tell you - GAY friends for LIFE, as always..you know, the works! :))
Yeah? So hurray for tinkertoon.
ReplyDeleteHmmm wonder if what I wrote above about godless online acquaintances quite register with you though..
A new year, a new begining...ka thlarau mi tehchiam lo na anga, kohna hi chu kawng engkimah hian a inlan thin hian ka hre ve.
ReplyDeleteAlly McBeal chu ka en ve ngai lo a, mahse thil duhzawng tak, a kim biai a han lakkhawm ve hrim hrim hian min tihlim a.
J, you just make me laugh sometimes (hint: tinkertoon comment above), I admire how you can always get your point across so clearly :) And I hope you live life the way you want to, for God. And write about it so I can take inspiration from you.
ReplyDeletevana, new year, new beginning vang em² pawh a ni lo. Ka in dap a ruak ka in ti ve em a ni :) Net vela Pathian leh kohhran trih lem lo tak² ten tawngkam thlahdah tak² a an rak vel lo chhiar ve fo hi chuan kan thil thlir dan hi a lo ti dang hret² a, hriat loh laiin kan rinna hi a lo pawt hniam thui thei khop mai. Hei vang hi ni ngei ang ABC = avoid bad company an tih fo thin. Real life ah pawh, net-ah pawh a lo ni tho mai.
ReplyDeleteJerusha, that's probably because you haven't heard me fudging issues in real life. I write well but alas, when it comes to actually verbalising my thoughts, I'm a gone case :(
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the very kind words though :)